Do you give in when you’re craving junk food and then wind up really disappointed in yourself later?
Well guess what?
You’re just like me, and millions of women around the globe struggling to lose weight.
So many of us are prone to this.
We gleefully begin a diet and exercise program with such enthusiasm and determination, to completely give into temptation within a short period of time and destroy our chances of success.
Why do we do this to ourselves?
Is it self hatred?
Is it old habit?
Is a sugar addiction?
Is it lack of will power?
Is it something from our childhood?
Perhaps it’s a combination of all of these things even?
Well today I’m going to suggest something that may change your life forever.
And this may not be popular, but it’s effective, and really that’s all that matters.
While I feel it’s very important to determine the triggers of our times of weakness, and I discuss in length how to do that in the Sexy Body Program, I think there’s something else that will completely change how you feel about embarking on your weight loss journey, and here it is:
“Stop focusing on the why… and just change.”
I know what you’re thinking right now… “Kristin you’re an idiot. Don’t you think I would have done so already if I could just snap my fingers and change?”
Yeah I gotcha… but you know what? I don’t think you’ve really adopted that mindset yet and here’s why (hear me out before you click out of here).
I used to look for all sorts of reasons why I wasn’t a success in getting the body of my dreams.
I blamed my genetics.
I blamed my age.
I blamed my lack of willpower.
I blamed how tired I was from being a working single mom.
I blamed what I learned from mother in childhood for emotional coping mechanisms.
I blamed my friends for not understanding that I wanted to get into great shape. How dare they tempt me!
I blamed my coworkers for putting junk food in front of me, taunting me. Don’t they know that’s not fair?
And while I was so busy BLAMING, I wasn’t DOING anything to change.
It was SO much easier to blame than it was to change, even though I was miserable.
It was SO much easier to complain about my circumstances than it was to truly put the effort in and modify my behaviors.
Because my circumstances, and my blaming, were comfortable.
My complaining, and my “woe is me” attitude, was familiar.
That was MUCH easier than venturing into the uncomfortable, such as:
Saying “no thank you”.
Saying “no thank you” again.
Saying “really, it looks delicious, but no thank you” even again.
Feeling a little ping of hunger, knowing I will survive if I wait for my next meal, that I won’t perish if I don’t head to the vending machine.
Getting up and going to the gym when I’m tired.
Actually feeling feelings of despair, frustration, or disappointment, rather than drowning those feelings with sugar. ←- And THAT one is HUGE for me my friends.
Actually FEELING those feelings rather than drowning them out.
Now THAT was uncomfortable.
THAT was a new behavior for me, and I sure didn’t like it.
It simply was much easier to not feel whatever I was feeling, and cope through junk food.
So instead of venturing into the uncomfortable with new behaviors to replace destructive old behaviors, I would analyze myself to death, trying to figure out why in the world I stayed on that treadmill (no pun) and never ever made any progress.
But did you know that’s normal?
That’s what we do as humans.
We will gravitate back to the familiar, even if it’s bad for us…
Instead of JUST CHANGING.
Once I made up my mind that it didn’t matter WHY I was continuing on the cycle, that I just needed to change the destructive behaviors and replace them with behaviors that would propel me toward my goals, that’s when everything started to fall into place.
That’s because our lifestyle is really made up of thousands of little decisions we make all day long.
We decide what to eat, when to move, when to sleep, who to talk to, what to think (yes you do decide this whether you’re doing so consciously or not), what words come out of our mouths, who to associate with, and so on.
Most of those decisions are made unconsciously, sticking with the familiar.
The key to breaking old familiar yet destructive habits and replacing them with new constructive behaviors is taking every little decision, one decision at a time, and making them consciously, venturing into the uncomfortable.
With each little change of pattern, you will begin to form new patterns of behavior, creating a new story for yourself.
With every time you say “no thank you” to the offer of junk food, you reinforce that feeling of accomplishment that you truly CAN resist destructive temptations.
With every time you move yourself off the couch and to the gym, you reinforce you ARE able to get there even when you’re tired.
With every time you block out that hour every few days to prep your meals in advance, you reinforce you CAN schedule the time to make sure you are prepared with healthy clean meals.
With every time you’re at a restaurant with friends and choose a plain salad over the burger and fries, you are creating an entirely new history to look back on to say to yourself, “yes, I CAN do this, because I have before”.
You see, it’s all those little tiny triumphs that enable you to recreate the story in your head, and create A NEW FAMILIAR one, that is constructive.
Instead of thinking, “I can’t do this.” or “I always fail”, you will be saying to yourself, “I can, because I have.”
So if this is you, I want you to do 2 things starting RIGHT NOW:.
#1 Consciously Choose To Change One Destructive Yet Familiar Behavior
Whatever that is, whether it’s not eating junk food late at night and having a bunch of fibrous vegetables instead.
Or actually going to the gym tonight even though you’re terrified to step into the weight room thinking you’ll feel ridiculous.
Or if you’re heading out with friends and they offer you that sugary alcoholic drink and saying, “no thank you, I’ll have coffee please”…
Whatever it is, choose simply one comfortable, familiar, yet destructive behavior and…
#2 Change It… TODAY.
Don’t say “but…” (oh my goodness did I used to be the queen of “yeah buts….”)
Just change it.
Then come back here and let me know how you did.